Have you ever truly thought about how we find and are connected to the people in our lives? Of course in the case of family members its genetics, but just because we are born into the same family doesn’t keep us family. Like our friendships, we gravitate towards those people with whom we feel a much deeper connection. Sisters may be sisters by blood, but that doesn’t make them friends. Friends are not sisters, but if you are lucky enough to share a deep bond with them, you may think of that friend as your sister.
Recently a woman who is a stranger to me, but connected by a high school friend, reminded me of a song called “The Story”. The lyrics of this song are meaningful to me for many different reasons but until she brought it up, I had forgotten about it. For this woman, the song defined her love affair with her husband and indeed, was the song that accompanied her walk down the aisle to him. Now, they have a tiny little baby fighting for her life and that song has taken on a whole different meaning for the mother.
All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am
Oh, but these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true, I was made for you
When a child comes into the world parents are designed to feel love for them and as the family grows and the children become adults, that parent/child connection continues. But if you have been truly lucky enough to experience your parent as an adult and a friend – if your parent has shared the story of who they are outside of the parent relationship – then something magical happens. You learn where they come from and what made them who they are as a person and not just as a parent. You connect with them on a deeper and possibly more meaningful level and that’s when you might finally realize that your parent was made for you and you were made for them.
The memories you make with your own parent shape and mold you until you become who you are meant to be and pass that story of who you are and how you got to where you are to your own child. You are sharing your story little by little with everyone you connect with and as the song says, those stories don’t mean anything when you’ve got no one to tell them to.
Are the connections we make in life truly just random? Or, are we made for people to share our lives with? Friends don’t become friends without something connecting us. Mother and fathers may become our parents because of biology, but adoptive families can have stronger and deeper bonds than some biological families. Is it because we are made for each other?
If you believe in a higher power, or fate or whatever you choose to call it, could it be as simple as that power having predetermined who we are made for? If you listen closely enough, if you are open to seeing the signs in front of you, will you find the person you were made for? When you do, share your story, for tomorrow is never guaranteed and I believe we are all here to share our story.
Be well my friends,
~BAL
Author Barbara A. Luker 