This is a day of thanks giving in the United States and like my family, others across the country will join together to share a bountiful feast.  The menu might be different depending on the family’s traditions, but we join together to give thanks for what the past year has brought us and what the future holds. 

Some families may begin their meal by everyone sharing what they are thankful for and although my family doesn’t do that, I nevertheless have always thought about exactly that.  So what’s the answer?

I am thankful that I have so much to be thankful for.  I have a loving family, a furry little being to keep me entertained and happy, a great job, good health, enough money to put food on my table and a roof over my head.  It’s something that I need to remember when work is stressful or my family is driving me nuts or when things don’t appear to be going my way and I’m frustrated.

So many others have nothing. In parts of the world parents watch their children wasting away from hunger and dream of someone giving them a morsel of food or a sip of water so they can get through another day of hell.  There are people, who through a single twist of fate, are homeless and living in a cardboard box.  There are people whose unexpected diagnosis of a life altering or fatal disease are faced with horrific decisions that will impact not only their life, but that of their entire family.  Famine, disease, poverty, violence – it all takes away the blessings we take for granted.

Days like today remind me that I too could be one disaster away from losing it all so Today at least I will appreciate all the loving people in my life and all the blessings I have been given and I will work hard to remember and cherish what I have.

Today and every day I also will appreciate and thank you for taking the time to read this and to reflect on the message.  May your Thanksgiving Day be filled with love, laughter and appreciation for the blessings in your own life.

Be well my friends….

~BAL

A couple of author Facebook groups I belong to have recently asked the question…”When are you officially an author?”  There were two answers to that question going through my mind. 

• When you have a book published; and/or
• When you actually write something.

The groups seemed equally split on the answer but it wasn’t until recently that I finally felt like an author.

My hometown has an active Friends of the Library group that works to promote reading and our local public library. The Friends invited me to participate in an author’s panel and I was thrilled to do so even if I wasn’t exactly sure what it would entail. It would be a milestone for me.

Having launched my first book right when the country was shutting down for COVID, it was the first official event where I would be introduced as an author. It was the first time people would see me as having accomplished something many could not. It was the first time people would see me as the expert in something that years ago I never would have dreamt of doing. It was the first time I would promote my writing in front of real people and not just through the internet. Yup….it was a big deal to me.

In my other life (working for the City of Saint Peter), I speak in front of groups all the time and I am pretty good at it, but for some reason this author panel scared me to death; a feeling only highlighted when I walked in the room and saw one of the other authors (Christine Husom) setting up a sales table with a dozen of the books she had written. My table, with its’ singular novel, looked quite sparse compared to hers and I felt pretty inadequate. When the four authors finally sat down to begin the panel, I was a nervous wreck.

I was so ill prepared for the event and for finally having an opportunity to self-promote my book, I didn’t even consider that maybe I should have my book with me at the table until seeing the other authors had theirs.

We knew what the moderators would ask us in advance and the two weeks prior I had studied and rehearsed my answers to the questions even though it wasn’t a test. To say I was nervous was an understatement but as the evening went on, I realized something.

While my answers were always shorter and more to the point than some of the other panelists, the audience was interested when I spoke and the other panelists were referring to my answers when they gave their own. I might have been the least experienced and the least accomplished author in the room, but people were listening to what I had to say. And maybe, because I was just getting started in my writing career, those in the audience who wanted to be authors might have been more interested in the more recent challenges I faced in getting my book published.

By the end of the evening, I learned a few lessons the most important of which is not to diminish my own accomplishment.  I might have only one book published now, but the next one comes out on March 3, 2022.  It’s the start of a journey that all authors take and I have already had much more success than most people.

Second is that while I can learn much from the journey other authors take, this journey is mine alone and it’s up to me to make what I want from it. Self-promotion does not come easily for me but like so many things in life, having the courage to step out of our comfort zones is an important part of growing.

And the last lesson comes down to one of the questions the moderators asked. “What do you want readers to take away from your work?” My answers is that I want everyone who reads one of my books to close the cover and feel warmth in their heart and maybe have a tear in their eye knowing that they have read a great story, that I have answered every question, and they want to read more.

When the panel ended that night, I had several audience members tell me they can’t wait to read more from me. To this beginning author, that’s the highest compliment I can receive.

So back to those author Facebook questions….I guess that now makes me officially an author!

Until next time my friends, be well!

~BAL

Today is Veteran’s Day and just a few days ago was Election Day.  The timing of that, while not officially connected in any way, is ironic don’t you think?  On Election Day, we vote to elect representatives as part of our free and open democracy.  On Veteran’s Day, we recognize the military service men and women who have for centuries sacrificed so much to protect that democracy from those who are threatened by our way of life.  Not many people give that much thought.  However, for someone intimately involved with elections who also comes from a military family, the correlation seems natural to me.

Military service in my family goes back decades. Navy, Air Force, Marines and Coast Guard are all represented (sorry Army!). Service has taken my brothers, uncles, and cousins all over the world both in peace and in war. Each deployment was heart wrenching and each homecoming was filled with joy, but beyond all that, each day has been filled with pride for the sacrifices our family member was making for our country. Veteran’s Day is special for us.

I didn’t serve, but through my work as an election official, I am doing my small part to give back to my community. Elections are hard work because something so vitally important as electing the people who run the country shouldn’t be easy. There are hundreds of hours of preparation that go into each election and that hard work has made Minnesota a model for election administration. We consistently have among the highest voter turnout in the nation and a robust system of checks and balances that keep our elections fair. It’s democracy at work every Election Day.

But should we have one day without the other? It takes all of us doing our own part to make sure the sacrifices of our Veterans are not made in vain. America must support each other by voting in every election and recognizing that our Veteran’s need support not just when they are deployed, but when they come home and need a job, a place to live and, unfortunately for so very many, mental health services.

Veterans are the backbone of this country. Let’s never forget and let’s always be there for them. Let’s make every day Veteran’s Day in honor and recognition of all those who have served.

Be well my friends!

~BAL

Readers you’ve patiently waited along with me, and now I can finally reveal the cover of my new novel, “I Carry Your Heart”. It’s a touching story of enduring love, the sacrifice we make for those we love, and the realization that those we love aren’t always who we think they are. I hope you’ll love it as much as I do!

But wait – I’m not done with the exciting news! Not only are you the first to see the cover, but you’re also the first to know that it is now available for PRE-ORDER only through my publisher at https://www.blackrosewriting.com/womens/icarryyourheart. Purchasing the book now comes with a bonus…15% off! Use the code PREORDER2021 to receive your discount but don’t delay….the discount is only available from Black Rose Writing and only before the official book launch day of March 3, 2022!

Once ordered, your book will automatically ship to you on or before the launch date. If you’re a procrastinator the book will still be available through the usual outlets (Amazon, Barnes and Noble etc…) after launch day, but why wait? And, when you are finished reading I hope you will leave a review online and let me know what you think.

Thank you for your support my friends and have a fantastic day!

~BAL

Having grown up in what I now realize was the age of innocence, I can’t help but wonder what if?  What if all those electronic devices with which we are now joined at the hip had never become commonplace?  What if kids had never discovered video games?  What if the only phone was still a family phone hanging from the kitchen wall where everyone else could hear your conversation? 

Technology has changed our world, but has it changed for the better? 

When I grew up things were simpler.  Videos were home movies.  Grainy, shaky and oftentimes embarrassing to watch, those 8mm home movies documented time spent as a family at birthday parties, backyard barbecues, holidays.  Good wholesome fun and frivolity.  Movies that my family still likes to watch for maybe the hundredth time which gives us a renewed sense of family.

Back then we watched TV together as a family because there was only one set in the house and we learned how to get along because we had no choice.  We weren’t in separate rooms with our noses buried in an electronic device. We ate together and played together and went to church together.  Our friends were all the other kids in the neighborhood who, like us, had been shooed out of the house where we learned to do things with our imagination.  Tag, pickup games of baseball, hide and seek and at this time of year, making leaf houses.  We were interacting and making friends and learning how to get along.

People talked over back fences and brought hot dishes to those who were struggling or had lost a loved one.  We left bikes out in the yard knowing they would still be there in the morning.  Car doors and house doors were never locked and if you saw a child crying you never thought twice about pulling them into your arms for a hug. 

“Please” was a word learned shortly after mommy and daddy and having to say “thank you” was ingrained in each of us.  If you had something bad to say about someone you kept it to yourself because that was the polite thing to do. 

We valued people who were honest and kind to everyone – people who worked hard and sacrificed for their family and others.We had a love for country and a pride in being American. 

But all that seems to be disappearing and while there could be many causes, it seems to me at least that having our noses in an electronic device for most of the day may be a large part of the reason.  Living in an electronic world we seem to forget there are real people with real feelings on the other end of our devices.  Remember how it started with emails?  Typing in ALL CAPS was seen as yelling and when we could no longer see the body language and emotions on the face of the people we were “communicating” with we seemed to have forgotten that someone living and breathing is on the other end of our communication and those communications are less civil.

Combine that with social media posts that are downright cruel and it’s no wonder people are angry all the time.  Every hastily typed response becomes a weapon. Words hurt and when people are hurt they lash out against the person who hurt them and it becomes a never ending cycle with people on both ends of a post feeling intense and lasting emotions.

We are losing the ability to interact face to face, to be diplomatic, to be kind and empathetic.  Is social media the cause of it all?  Maybe. But when we fail to remember that the hurtful things we post have consequences, our society is diminished and we all suffer for it.

We think we are anonymous when posting comments on social media and all too often we forget our mother’s words… “If you can’t say something nice, say nothing at all.”

So I ask you all to do one thing. Before you hit the send button on your next snarky post, email or text, take a deep breath and consider whether the hurtful comment you are about to make is worth causing another person’s pain. Then delete your post. Your mother would appreciate it.

Have a wonderful day my friends….

~BAL

A Police Officer friend told me once that we never truly know who people are behind closed doors and they know that because we go into those private spaces in our homes and on our computers and phones and those on the outside never know exactly who we are in private. A successful doctor who is a hoarder. A business person whose house is littered with illegal drug paraphilia. A pillar of the church who …..well you see my point.

We are different when no one is watching and maybe that’s the time when who we are as a human being is best scrutinized.

These days there are cameras everywhere and it seems everything we do is scrutinized, but unless you are up to something you shouldn’t do, you probably don’t think about those cameras. Lucky for us cameras often capture someone doing something extraordinary that they may never talk about. Take for instance the man who on a brutally cold winter day passes a stray dog. The dog has no protection against the elements and is huddled into a tiny ball on the sidewalk in a futile effort to keep warm. The man passes by at first with only a quick glance at the pup, but then he’s back. He takes off his coat, wraps it tightly around the dog and then, arms wrapped around his body against the now sudden cold, walks away.

No one made him do it and with no one seemingly watching, there were no accolades or rewards for his action, but it was the right and generous thing to do.

Or how about the recent video of a man who saw an American flag disposed of in some random person’s trash with just a bit of the red, white and blue visible. We watched as he drove by but then came back, removed the flag and folded it with the greatest of respect into the familiar triangle before placing it on a nearby table, stepping back and offering a salute. Then he simply drove away. All caught on security video that he most likely never realized was there. He did something simply because it was the right thing to do with no expectation of anyone else ever knowing about it.

Kids are great at doing random acts of kindness. They do it because something inside told them it was the right thing to do and when it’s done they move on to something else. Unlike kids most adults are programmed to want recognition for a good deed. Hey look at me, I donated thousands of dollars to a charity. Hey look at me, I bought Thanksgiving dinner for a poor family. Hey look at me….look at me….look at me.

I believe that if you have to be recognized for something kind and right that you have done for another then you are doing it for the wrong reason. The true measure of a man is what we do when no one is watching. When there is no reward or recognition. For in fact, the greatest reward we can have for doing good things for others is the feeling inside – the feeling that for that brief moment you made someone else’s life better. And if you do it often enough, you will find happiness inside you that no amount of public recognition can ever equal.

So I ask you my friends, what are you doing when no one is watching?

Be well….

~BAL

The sky is yellow.  It’s in print so it must be true right? 

For the last several years our country has faced what may be its greatest threat and it’s coming from within. Lies. Lies in print, lies on TV, lies on the internet. Somewhere along the line we seem to have lost the ability to distinguish truth from those lies. Lies have become the clickbait of our life and the juicier the lie the more people who seem to accept it as fact.

Even in the face of undisputable proof that a lie is just that, many of us just won’t believe when a lie is exposed for what it is. What is it the media calls it? Fact checking? Why do so many of us continue to believe the falsehoods we hear even when provided with facts to repudiate the lie? From politics to business to vaccines, people are believing lies even when every bit of evidence proves it to be untrue.

Have you ever noticed that when a newspaper prints something that later turns out to be untrue and then prints a correction that the correction is almost impossible to find? The correction will more often than not be buried in the bowels of the paper where it could be easily missed, but even if they print a correction, that’s not what you’ll remember.

Your mind is not going to register the fact that the sky is actually blue.  You’re going to remember the misstatement because of the impact it had on you.  That’s important to remember as day in and day out we watch lies being shared on the internet and in coffee shops and offices and everywhere else around the country.  We’re always going to remember and most likely repeat the most salacious, damning and gossip worthy lies and few will remember or accept the actual truth.  The game of telephone our country now seems to be playing will continue and the truth will become even more distorted as the lie is passed from person to person until eventually no one knows what to believe and no one trusts anything anyone tells them.

All it takes is one little seed of mistrust spread by a casual lie that someone takes as gospel.  Make it juicy enough and it will be repeated.  Repeat it often enough and get so called experts to also repeat it and suddenly it takes on a life of its’ own.  The COVID-19 vaccine includes a microchip and the government is going to track us with it.  The election was stolen.  The moon landing was staged.  The earth is flat.  Name a topic and someone will tell lies about it and it’s tearing our country apart.

If we don’t learn to distinguish fact from fiction and lies from the truth, if we don’t learn to accept the truth when proof is given and admit we have made a mistake, we are doomed as a country.   Don’t let lies blind you to the truth of whatever issues we face.  Don’t fall for the con perpetuated by the con men.  Don’t become victim of scams that feed on our fears and our desires. 

I grew up in a household where lying was not acceptable and I’m willing to bet most of you did too.  Let’s use those lessons and get out a cake of soap and wash out the mouths of those who tell falsehoods as we learn to sort through the lies and trust in the experts who have no hidden political agenda.  Let’s get back to honesty being the best policy and having enough grace to admit when we told a lie in the first place. 

Let’s find our truth once again my friends. Until then, be well.

~BAL

I love a good animal story.  You know the kind I mean.  An injured animal rescued by some well-meaning humans and after months of rehab released back into the wild to live the life it was meant to have.

This is not that kind of story.

The first inkling I had that something was happening was a lunchtime Facebook post from someone asking for help for an injured owl. The owl had crawled into the bushes in a park right behind City Hall.  For a raptor that normally roosts in the trees during the day and is active only at night, seeing an owl on the ground during the day is most definitely concerning. 

Paging through the comments on the Facebook post I knew the answers were not going to result in help for the owl.  How did I know this?  Because I am a long-time supporter of the world renowned Raptor Center (RC) at the University of Minnesota. The RC provides medical care and rehabilitation for raptors of all sizes and, in the best case scenario, is lucky enough to release the birds back into the wild. Their educational posts have provided lots of information about how to help injured birds.

So naturally I posted the author should contact the Raptor Center, but I also put a large box and a pair of sturdy gloves in my car as I headed back to work slightly early.  Taking a slow trip around the road where the owl was spotted, I had a plan to rescue the bird myself and take it to the Raptor Center for care. Their natural colored plumage is well suited to camouflage it from the surrounding foliage and unfortunately I saw no sign of the bird, but hoped that maybe someone else had gathered the bird up and were finding help for it.

Just a few hours later I heard a co-workers voice.  “Hey raptor lady, do you want to take an injured owl up to the Center?”  Somehow she too had become involved in the owl’s plight and before I knew it the owl had been caught by yet another co-worker, placed in a large dog crate and deposited in my office.  The RC was willing to look at the owl as long as someone (me) could bring it to them.

To keep the owl (who we had by that point named “Peter” after the City of St. Peter) calm, the dog crate was covered with towels. Halfway up I had a horrible thought. Peter hadn’t made a single sound the entire time. Maybe he was dead?! It wasn’t until arriving at the Center, when a staff person came out to help me with the crate, that I finally got to see him. Lifting the towel, two very large, golden eyes peered back at me from inside the crate. He looked alert and his wing, which had been at a very odd angle when first placed in the crate, was now tucked next to his body. He had made it through the trip and the glimmer of hope I had felt when I first heard about him turned into a small flame.

I wasn’t able to go into the Center with Peter and as I stood out on the loading dock waiting for them to transfer him to their cage and return our dog crate, I nearly jumped out of my skin at the scream of an eagle coming from one of the Center rookeries located right behind me.  It was a great reminder of the work they do and that Peter was in good hands. On my way home again I allowed myself to start imagining what the day would be like when I could witness his release and nature would once again be restored.

That daydream lasted only until the phone call from the RC a few days later.  Peter didn’t make it.  He had a dislocated elbow and a broken wing and the wounds had become infected.  Too ill to be saved, they had done the humane thing and ended his suffering.  Because the Raptor Center is an educational endeavor through the College of Veterinary Medicine, they gathered as much information about Peter as they could and graciously shared it with me. 

Peter was, in fact, a girl.  She was a “hatch year” owl born in March or April of this year…so still just a young bird.  They couldn’t say for sure how she had been injured, only that the injuries were quite old and she had been in quite a lot of pain for a very long time.  It was very hard to hear the woman say that if someone had found Peter much earlier she might very well have been saved. While I don’t know for sure, I expect owls are very much like other animals and when ill or injured, they do everything possible to hide it from possible predators. The fact that Peter had shown herself to any number of humans most likely meant she was desperate and that broke my heart.

The news was devastating of course, but Peter’s death was not in vain.  The Saint Peter community came together with dozens of people invested in rescuing her.  I got to see the beauty of a Great Horned Owl up close and I was finally able to do more than write a check to help these glorious birds.  Peter’s suffering was ended in the most humane way possible and while very sad, at least she is no longer in pain.

Another blessing is that the whole incident allowed me to spread the news about the Raptor Center and the wonderful and innovative work they do to save magnificent birds.

It was an ending none of us had hoped for, but as with so many things in life, an experience none of us will forget – least of all me.

Maybe I shouldn’t be using this blog for promotion of something I hold so dear, but If you love seeing eagles and hawks and falcons and owls and even vultures flying high in the sky, I hope you too will consider supporting the Minnesota Raptor Center or a similar organization in your area.  You can find out more at https://raptor.umn.edu

Rest in peace our dear Peter and be well my friends….

~BAL

While some may argue differently, one of the very best things about living in Minnesota is when summer turns to fall.  Meteorologists tell us that officially happened this past week, but for me fall arrives with the changing of the leaves.  Here in the river valley that is a true sight to behold and with our varied and diverse urban forest, more often than not we are treated to a spectacular show by Mother Nature. 

I first noticed the beginnings of the annual display this week. In a community whose inventory of towering and decades old trees was decimated by a tornado, trees are as precious as gold and trees that were replanted after the tornado are now growing large enough to contribute to the display of fall colors. For whatever reason on this particular day, I noticed the first faint yellows crowning the deep greens of the maples, elms, locust and walnut trees. It was just a taste of what is to come and I can’t wait.

As the leaves begin to change my family starts planning for random trips around the state to see the splendor of nature’s paintbrush with our own eyes. While our river valley is one of the premier drives at this time of year, I can’t wait to head north and stand on a hilltop to see forests filled with splashes of color reflecting off the quiet and still waters of one of our thousands of lakes. It makes you catch your breath and reminds me that I am only a small cog in the world.

Too busy most of the time to even remember what day it is, stopping to experience Mother Nature in all her glory serves as a wake-up call to really see what surrounds me. There is beauty in the simplest of things if we only just take the time to realize it. Maybe like me you spent endless hours as a child laying on your back gazing up at a blue sky dotted with clouds so full and fluffy you felt like you could sleep on them. Or maybe you remember seeing the first hint of purple as a crocus popped it’s head up through the remnants of a winter snow. It’s been ages since I stopped long enough to appreciate those little things.

It seems we don’t pay attention until something dramatic happens. Floods, tornadoes, fire, damaging storms all get our attention and maybe that’s Mother Nature’s way of reminding us she’s still there.  The four seasons that make Minnesota a mecca for those who love the outdoors are all harbingers of nature righting itself. Drought like we have experienced this summer is no match for the march of the seasons.  Winter’s snowfall will lay a white carpet that come spring will soon enough replenish our lakes and rivers. The fires in northern Minnesota and other parts of the United States will give way next spring to little touches of green popping up through the ashes as nature reasserts itself and rebuilds that which was lost.  If only we could be so resilient.

It’s a lesson I am reminded of every fall that “This too shall pass”. Whether it be hardship or joy, feast or famine, it will eventually pass the same as the seasons in a never ending circle of rebuilding.

So, today, take a moment to stop and see the beauty around you. Let the sun shine on your face, the wind mess up your hair and take in the fall colors for soon enough winter will be here.

Be well my friends….

~BAL

Many years ago, far too many to admit, I was at a wedding when one of my friends told me that she had overheard three women talking about me.  That’s never a good sign right?  But as it turned out, the women were actually paying me a compliment as my friend overheard them say, “I never realized how pretty she is.” 

For a young woman struggling with self-esteem issues, that comment made my night. The fact that I remember it so clearly years later attests to the fact that that little comment, by people I didn’t know and still don’t know, has had a lifelong impact on me. Those women will never know that and most likely wouldn’t even remember the comment, but to me it had a monumental and lasting impact.

I’ve been lucky enough to have two similar experiences throughout my life and each time it happens I go through a myriad of emotions. As a private person I can’t help but bemoan the fact that complete strangers are talking about me, but when I get past that thought I’m flooded with surprise, delight and, if I’m being totally honest, pure joy. That feeling stays with me for a long time and like the very first time it happened, the person who paid me the compliment probably forgot it the next day.

Here’s the thing though.  As much as I have appreciated and been impacted by being the recipient of such nice thoughts, I have learned that it can be equally impactful to me to be the giver.  Seeing a smile build on someone’s face as it sinks in that the stranger addressing them has just made their day is worth more than any compliment I could ever receive.  I might never see that person again, but if we happen to run into each other in the grocery store in the future, I can guarantee that I will receive a smile in return and maybe, just maybe, I will have made a new friend.

What goes around comes around in this thing we call life and if you believe that, believe this… the blessings you bestow on others will come back to you.  Whether it be complimenting someone or doing something to make someone else’s life easier, if you can put a smile on someone else’s face you will have made their day and in return you might have made your own!

When you see something beautiful in someone, tell them!

Be well my friends for you make me smile every day….

~BAL